Tearing apart your favorite movies
Two years ago in a studio not far, far away.... J.J. Abrams rebooted yet another franchise — this time "Star Wars." Well, "reboot" is a kind word, since this is essentially just a remake of the original film. It has a spherical R2-D2, an angsty millennial Darth Vader, and a female Luke Skywalker. We get it, Disney, you wanted to sell some toys. More...
In another installment of our bonus segment "In Theaters," we give you our immediate reaction to seeing a new movie on the big screen. This time, we tackled "Lady Bird" which currently sits at 100% on Rotten Tomatoes and is surely on its way to Oscar glory. But did this bird soar, or merely lay an egg?
**NOTE: THIS EPISODE CONTAINS SPOILERS**
The 2012 hit film "Pitch Perfect," about dueling college a cappella groups is an "a-ca-terrible" combination of the movies "Dodgeball" and "Mean Girls," but instead of being funny, it is just a bunch of people lip-synching over-produced Auto-Tune vocals to songs we all rightly forgot about a while ago. More...
The 1989 Rob Reiner-directed and Nora Ephron-written vehicle "When Harry Met Sally...” ushered in Meg Ryan as a leading lady and has been a pox on all of our houses ever since. We know that this movie is fiction because it pretends 41-year-old Billy Crystal is a twenty-something Lothario who has slept with so many women that he may need to leave New York City. More...
The 1990 fairytale "Edward Scissorhands" about an artificial man named Edward—an unfinished creation who has scissor blades instead of hands—is in and of itself a movie that's an artificial and unfinished creation. Tim Burton lathers the film with his usual coating of visual flair, but adds no substance beneath it. More...
Garry Marshall's 1990 blockbuster film, "Pretty Woman," is a Cinderella story, if Cinderella were a $100-per-hour call girl and Prince Charming were a Wall Street douche with daddy issues. The movie can't seem to decide if money is the root of all evil or if having a bunch of it solves everyone's problems. More...
The fourth installment of the "Jurassic Park" franchise from 2015, "Jurassic World," is yet another mediocre sequel to the original 1993 masterpiece. The story is unoriginal, the characters are annoying cartoons and the special effects aren't even as realistic as the first one, despite 22 years of CGI advancement. More...
Happy Halloween! Back in the year 1996, famed horror director Wes Craven and the dude who made "Dawson’s Creek," Kevin Williamson, got together to produce an ultra-self-referential stabfest called "Scream." It led to three sequels as well as a TV series, and it launched the careers of some of the most annoying people the '90s had to offer. More...
If you build it (a baseball field for ghosts who were banned from the major leagues for cheating) and you kidnap a civil rights activist, he (the ghost of your estranged dad) will come. As a fringe benefit, a bunch of sightseers will also show up so you can turn your home into a profitable tourist trap. More...
Lasse Hallström's 1999 Oscar darling "The Cider House Rules" is crafted to seem like a heartwarming coming-of-age story about leaving childhood behind and falling in love for the first time, but it's really just an incoherent pro-choice diatribe that ends up having nothing to say on the issue. More...
We want to introduce you to a brand-new bonus segment we'll be doing sporadically on Film Snuff that we're calling "In Theaters." This is our immediate reaction after seeing a new movie we're interested in that was just widely released theatrically.
**NOTE: THIS EPISODE CONTAINS SPOILERS**
G'day, mates! The 1986 Aussie-American comedy "Crocodile Dundee" takes us deep into the Outback on a harrowin’ journey with poisonous snakes, gun-totin’ roos and giant rubber crocs. It also takes us to NYC where the hero of the story goes around Manhattan while casually assaulting newspaper editors, pimps, cross-dressers and small-knife-wielding, would-be muggers. More...
Back in the year 2000, Nancy Meyers made "What Women Want," another installment in her series of battle of the sexes films that purport to be pro-women but are anything but. She seems to believe that the only thing women want is to find a bad boy and make him want to change his ways just for her. More...
In Part 2 of our discussion about Canadian madman James Cameron's 1997 blockbuster film "Titanic," we go through the second half of the movie, which essentially feels like a different picture than its first half. Where that half was a fruity love story, this part is more of an action film. This is clearly where most of the budget was spent in all of its freezing, flailing, falling and frantic frenzy. More...
In this episode, we'll cover the first half of James Cameron's 1997 film, “Titanic.” It’s a story of two star-crossed lovers overcoming their socioeconomic differences only to experience one of the worst maritime disasters of the 20th century. More...
The 1993 inspirational (to idiots) sports drama, "Rudy," is based on a true story—meaning that it’s mostly made up. Most of the characters never existed, and all the events are misconstrued to make it seem like this little manipulative weasel actually accomplished something special. He didn't. More...
The 1989 megahit Disney flick, "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids" is allegedly a fun comedic science fiction movie for children. In fact, it's actually a disturbing horror film. During their harrowing journey, the shrunken kids narrowly escape getting crushed to death by falling debris, being drowned in a flood, getting attacked by giant insects, being chopped to bits by a lawnmower and being eaten alive. More...
Damien Chazelle's 2016 musical "La La Land” follows an age-old tradition of blatantly making movies for the sole purpose of washing Hollywood's balls in order to win Oscars. It’s right on par with other transparently pandering piles of garbage like 2014’s “Birdman,” 2012’s “Argo” and 2011’s “The Artist.” More...
Get your head out of a horse's *** and join us as we discuss former President William Jefferson Clinton's favorite film, the 1984 classic, "Police Academy." The movie made $146M at the box office and spawned six sequels as well as a short-lived TV series. It's only a matter of time before J.J. Abrams or one of the Nolan brothers makes a gritty reboot or prequel. More...
The 2008 Best Picture winner, "Slumdog Millionaire," is a fake episode of "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?” set in India with an evil version of Regis Philbin. Despite the fact that the questions they ask are extremely easy, Evil Reege suspects the winning contestant of cheating and turns him over to corrupt cops who attempt to torture a confession out of him. More...